Why so serious?

I'm watching the sleet coming down outside, having little desire to go out in it. The kids and James played outside a bit this morning, but came in saying they were finished being outside. It's a quiet day. I'm catching up on my email, thinking about doing some laundry and/or other housework. My hormones seem to be influencing my mood a bit toward the down-side. That will pass, as always, I'm sure.

My job at i3 Research will end next week. We will have finished the project. Hopefully the study's results will be published late this spring. I am a little sad to see it go, as I have really enjoyed the work and working with my fellow speech raters. I must admit, however, I am looking forward to the extra time not working will bring.

What has happened to funny Helen? I feel so serious all the time now. Got to get to the bottom of this. Has anyone encountered funny Helen recently? Light-hearted Helen? I miss her.

You know what? I just decided that I am going to start a jigsaw puzzle this afternoon. That should be fun. There is even room to spread it out on the dining room table. I like that idea. Maybe fun Helen will help me put it together.

Wednesday

It's Wednesday. Tonight is choir night. In my new position as senior warden of our church I have a finance committee meeting to attend as well tonight. I've arranged childcare for the time when the finance committee is meeting, but the it's not time for the kids to start their choir rehearsals. I've turned over leadership of tonight's Beckwith Choir rehearsal to my assistant directors. I plan to attend adult choir rehearsal long enough to rehearse the anthem for this Sunday and a little beyond that. I will leave early enough to get back home for the kids' bedtime routines.

Originally I was going to work today, but had to make arrangements not to do so when MC got sick. Now it looks like she's going to be fine to go to school today. Too late to rearrange and work again. Someone is already covering my shift who wants the hours. So that leaves me with 4 hours by myself this morning (assuming MC does in fact go to school - don't know for sure yet because she's still sleeping). Her birthday (and party) are Sunday and the house could use a lot of TLC to prepare for our princess guests.

My goals for today house-wise are going to be kept simple: put away the Christmas decorations and gifts that are still in the living room, complete one cycle of laundry, begin to clean off the dining room table. Personally, my goals are simple too: read daily Scripture, prepare for finance committee meeting, apply root touch-up solution to combat the skunk-like look of my hair at the part-line. Already completed one goal: to blog.

First bloggable thoughts of 2010

I'm still here, just haven't been blogging. Life is moving along steadily, and at a much faster pace than I wish. I really do appreciate those of you who may have checked in from time to time to see what I've been up to or what's on my mind.

I put this picture in for something to make you smile. I wore this dress in a wedding when I was around 5 or 6 years old.

Right now I've got a daughter who is feeling much better than she was in the middle of last night. Love to hear her singing and playing again.

So far I've caught up with all the daily Scripture passages I've been planning to read in 2010.

My family has clean underwear.

I know what I'm cooking for supper.

We don't have anywhere we have to be tonight.

It's just that so often when I come here to write, it's because I've been inspired to do so in an effort to put me in a better mood or solve some sort of problem. Something for me to work on: blogging out of funny or happy inspirations.

Stay tuned, and thanks for your patience.

not working

my plan is not working so well. I am still feeling overwhelmed with things to do and having frustration about not getting them done, yet I am paralyzed when it comes to taking action. This is not entirely true, of course. I did figure out what leftovers we will have for supper and I did get the kids to the dentist today. But that didn't yield good news. Son got a referral to the orthodontist. Daughter has two more cavities! So we're going to have to floss and brush for her, as well as add an additional fluoride gel on top of her teeth after brushing at bedtime. Not fun for someone who doesn't want any help. Also, we will have to change some eating and drinking habits.

I'm feeling a little angry and frustrated and poor-me-ish. And guilty for all of those feelings. I do not like being a perfectionist! It is weighing me down right now.

clearing out the cobwebs

I once again have so many thoughts swimming about in my head that I can't focus on one at a time. So this entry will just be thoughts (that I'm willing to share) that I am listing for the sole purpose of helping to make space in my head to be able to concentrate on a few select things. Then hopefully I will be able to accomplish some things that have not gotten done due to the excuse that I just can't focus on them.

1. plan menus
2. update resume
3. put things away
4. create homes for things that don't have homes
5. exercise
6. learn Spanish
7. vestry clerk work
8. put away spring/summer clothes
9. laundry
10. update filing system
11. complete obligated correspondence
12. trim bushes
13. use up pantry food that I bought on a whim
14. set up printer

Oh there are many more, but maybe writing down these will help. It would also help dramatically if I were not such a perfectionist about these things!

Thinking Out Loud

Now that I've been back at work for a few months, I have gotten bitten by that helping others bug again. I love helping people communicate! So of course, I have started thinking about my career future again. I feel like I just finished college and was first figuring out what I wanted to do for a career. Only this time I like what I do. I think I just want to do that and more!

So the purpose of this entry is to get some of my thoughts out of my head. I also appreciate your feedback, as I rely on others to help me sort out my thoughts. I am not ready to jump ahead and take any irreversible action at this time. But I'd like to see what my options might be. Also, feel free to play devil's advocate with me, just indicate that you're doing so please. :)

Here are the parts of my job as a speech therapist that I really like:

• working with other people
• helping people with communication impairments make breakthroughs
• working with both patients/clients and families
• making a difference in their lives
• the spiritual high I get when I am in a relationship with a patient and/or family member
• how people seem to see my faith in me
• how I get to see others' faith in action
• teaching/training others

Here are things I don't necessarily do now but would like to do in a career:

• public speaking
• be able to communicate on a very basic level in Spanish when needed
• teaching
• counseling
• provide multiple services for others through my own skills or a network of professionals/charity organizations

Here are some reasons why I need to take this slowly:

• uncertainty of James' employment future
• I tend to get ahead of myself at times
• I already have a lot of commitments to others, especially to my family at this time
• My family must be my priority
• What if God is calling me to something new and different? How do I discern that?
  

Clean Playroom!

I'm very happy with the new and improved playroom. I (with significant help from MC) have tossed a kitchen trashbag-full of broken, outdated, no longer wanted and not suited to give away stuff. (Actually MC removed a few things from the trash. Her help was with the rest of the project.)

We removed some toys that are used for periodic play and stored them in the basement. We rearranged the furniture so that the rug in the middle of the room is absolutely bare. MC showed me how she can now dance in there. We dusted and vacuumed too, and it looks great. Only thing is now that she's got space to play in there, she's taken out all of her doll and stuffed animal friends and is playing with them in the (clean) living room. But that's okay, because the dolls and animals have homes in the playroom. It will be easy to clean them up tonight before going to bed. Oh, if only we can keep it this way.... (fingers crossed).

I have to add that after I wrote this, MC initiated cleaning up her dolls and animals from the living room before she started watching Dora on tv. She said from now on she would always put things away before starting to play with something else. I did not have to say anything to her - all her idea! I love it!